Three years ago Kate graduated from Exeter University. It was a hot July day and even then it was a challenge to make sure Roch made it but we did it and it was a memorable day. There we were, as I recall, sipping champagne and eating cupcakes (very Exeter), surrounded by blue balloons, when Roch turned to me with tears in his eyes.
"I won't live to see Tom graduate," he said. Feeling a bit like Samwise Gamgee encouraging Frodo (for all you LOTR fans), I duly replied,
"You never know, Roch, you never know, it may happen yet."
And it has...
On a hot July day last week, we watched our son graduate from Southampton University. Best moment of the day was when we turned and saw him emerge having been robed in preparation for the ceremony. The sudden sight of him with mortar board and robes took my breath away. Maybe that was my proudest moment.
Tom had been active in making sure all was prepared for his father's comfort. The wheelchair space in the lecture theatre was by an exit, but with a great view of the stage. Nearby was a room we could use if Roch needed the ventilator or a rest. He didn't need it during the ceremony, but later in the afternoon we took the opportunity to 'plug him in' for a while and he dozed.
Another good moment for me was when a young helper approached to ask if I needed directions (all very well organised) as I looked round vaguely, wondering where to pay for the official photographs. "Are you graduating today?" she asked.
I know, I know, she probably thought I was a mature student - but even so - that put a spring in my LK Bennet step! (Those shoes have accompanied me to every major event since 2011, by the way...)
Later in the day I had another surprise. As we waited for our meal to be served, the family presented me with a small (but very beautiful) gift, to recognise my part throughout the last six years in making sure it was possible for both our children to leave home to go to University, despite Roch's illness. I was taken completely unawares. In fact, they made it easy for me as when Kate was away, Tom was at home and when she graduated and came home, it was Tom's turn to go, so I always had the support at home of one of our children.
It was a very precious family moment.
Seven years ago, Kate was 17 and Tom was 14 and as we faced the reality of his diagnosis, we hoped that somehow Roch would live to see them both leave Secondary school. "If only we can get them past their A Levels", we said to one another.
Now they are all grown up and they still have their father. One in the eye for the monkey.
|14 July 2016|